GAAAH

*the internet connection has been so damn slow for some days. I’d waited for hours before surfing on the net, but mostly it doesn’t work. What the worm.

2 posting a day. I got nothing to do -______- well; I haven’t done my art and bahasa project, actually. I don’t like disturbing my free Saturday by doing those continuous tasks even I have to finish them as I have spare time. Assignment keeps going on and on and on and on and sometimes it drives me mad. It’s bored. Oh yes that’s definitely true.

Hmm… anyway, I’ve promised you I’ll tell things that have happened in past a week, haven’t I? Anyway, they’re so many, dear. I think I’d better think about it by myself instead telling them to you all, because they’re just nothing for others’ ears. But you can see one of them on freyona.blogspot.com with post title "ngamuk...hahhaha" if you want it and drop some comment (ok I have no promise anymore,ryt?).

*hei gendis, I've promoted your blog anyway. I dunno why I can't link it in this post :(

So… I’m currently listening to old songs, again. There’re so many new songs coming out and I just need a different one to balance the atmosphere in my head (hah?).

*I want change the word ‘she’ and ‘her’ but I’m lazy to do that. And I didn't write any repetition stanza

Supernova—Ellegarden

My war is over
No resurrection
I guess I was scared of being that happy
She's a supernova I was reaching out for
I heard her footsteps fading away from me

No matter how hard I can try
I never think that I can fly
And now she has turned her backed to me
There is nothing I can do as well
But to dream her all the time
I'm a fuckup and I'm nuts so she's gone

My clumsy dancing on my tiptoe
She said she liked it and I thought she was lying
Now I know she said that not to cheer me
But now it's too late fading away from me

Many things I left unsaid
A thousand miles away you're sleeping
Sometimes I can be a guy you wanted me to be
But only in my dreams

No matter how hard I try
I never think that I can fly
And now she has just turned her back to me
There is nothing I can do as well
But to dream her all the time
I'm a fuckup and I'm nuts so she's gone
I'm a fuckup and I'm nuts so she's gone

bye.

i got no title

yeay, the 8th fasting day :D
alhamdulillah belom ada yang bolong. lancaaarrrr... wkwkwkwk.

belakangan ini moodnya masih labil karna berbagai hal yang dengan ngga sopannya merusak acara puasa gue. bahkan skarang sebenernya sedang ngga mood buat ngeblog, makanya ngetiknya ngasal banget.
maybe i'll write about those annoying things later, when I'm more stable to tell the stories and to give my arguments.

fasting and bad thing

the first fasting day is 2 days to go.
I have prepared things that may need during the month. hmm.. I think it won't be so easy for me with school stuffs and anything else :D
I must pass this month well (better than last year, I have to keep myself from little-but-meaningful-sin, hehe, amin).

But the most important thing is this; I often thinking bad things about my environment and blame them whenever I got bad mood. I know it's sooo WRONG. I dunno why I can do so, neither I know how to make that thing vanished.

It's been some days from the first that horrible thing happened. I just feel like I'm not on the new circle formed by those bonds while people keep exist on it and make it grows stronger. I assume it seems like I just stand there temporarily, and that every second goes by, I have a big possibility to jump off the circle and being isolated with my own.
Well, this is just my own thought, people might have different one from mine. Can you see what I'm talking about?

happy H!

Happy Independence Day, Indonesia!

Yah, mari kita berbahasa Indonesia saja, hehe. Tapi mohon maaf karena saya belum terbiasa berbicara bahasa Indonesia baku, jadinya campur-campur ;)

Tadi pagi, jam 10 pagi WIB, saya dan mama saya nonton upacara peringatan detik-detik kemerdekaan yang disiarkan SEMUA stasiun TV. Wih, kita penonton setia upacara 17 Agustusan dari taun ke taun lhooo..
So so so, selama 2,5 jam tadi kita ‘mencenger’ (=serius) di depan TV ngliatin SBY berdiri-duduk-berdiri jadi inspektur upacara. Trus trus pas Paskibraka-nya keluar, mama saya uda nanya-nanya temen SD saya ada di pasukan yang mana.

Hm.. hm.. iya jadi begini, temen jaman SD saya di Banjarbaru (Kal-Sel) itu ada yang ngewakilin provinsinya di Paskibraka, namanya Dita Permatasari (bagi yang ngga nonton acara penurunan bendera di istana). Trus ceritanya dia masuk nominasi 4 besar pembawa baki (kalo ngga salah inget ya), jadi deh mama saya pengen tau gimana temen SD saya itu sekarang. Ternyata dia yang bawa baki pas penurunan bendera (yaampun cape-cape latihan baris cuma disuruh bawa baki, hwhwhw, bodohnya gue).

Iya, dia temen deket saya waktu SD, hehe. Lucu deh tadi mama sama kakak saya nginget-nginget jaman saya SD. Iyalah lucu, tingkah temen-temen tuh pada aneh-aneh gitu. Masa’ ya pemirsa, saya kan lagi main di rumah rame-rame, eh kebetulan papa pulang buat makan siang. Padahal saya pikir biasa aja kali ya, tapi temen-temen saya pada ngibrit pulang hanya karena papa saya ada di rumah. Hihihihi, geli ngingetnya.

“Pit, aku bulik lah, ada abah ikam tu na, aku kada wani,”

(Pit, aku pulang ya, ada papa kamu tuh, aku ngga berani)

Hanya itu alesan kenapa temen-temen saya pulang tiba-tiba walopun kita sedang asik-asiknya main panjat pohon mangga. Hahaha, papa saya kedengerannya angker ya?
Dan bukan cuma temen saya yang komentar begitu, temen-temen kakak saya juga, hahahaha. Padahal papa saya baik banget lho (promosi, promosi).

Duh, jadi malu sendiri deh. Temen saya aja uda banyak yang pada berhasil gitu, eh saya masih begini-begini aja. Sedih bener.
Dulu waktu masih SD, guru saya pernah bilang, siapa tau saya bisa jadi anggota Paskibraka. Hmm.. namanya juga anak SD, saya waktu itu sampe mimpi jadi pengibar bendera di istana, hahah. Tapi apadaya, biarpun akademik bisa dibilang lumayan (begh, pede berat), pertumbuhan primer saya ngga bisa dibilang bagus T.T

Oke. Cukup sampe situ aja ceritanya.

Actually there’re some drafts in my folder, but I won’t post it today. I need to edit them once more, hehehe. I’ll post it later, so just wait patiently ya, my readers (hahahaha, pede lagi).

Bye.

MERDEKA!

holiday is aaaalways short

Holiday is always short.
I enjoyed this Saturday just about 6 hours before maghrib. Ask why? Last night I couldn’t sleep early, as usual. My sister also awoke; she used to sleep late when the next day’s work day off. I went to bed at 12am and woke up this morning at 11am sharp (is it really ‘morning’?), hahahaha. So I had had slept for almost 11 hours. I beat the time it takes to trip to Jogja from Jakarta by sleeping. Wew.

I thought it was still morning when I first open my eyes; I didn’t realize my wall clock pointing numbers that formed a 30-degree angle, 11 and 12.
“Wow, is it really 11? So that’s why I feel no sleepy anymore this morning (IS IT REALLY ‘MORNING’ GUYS?), . . . .”

Jadi begitulah hari ini gue mulai dengan prestasi gemilang yang unexcpected itu. Kakak gue juga heran, ko bisa-bisanya sepules itu lebai banget gitu yaaaaa. Ah yasu. I did my routine rituals morning, then; bangun tidur ku terus mandi, tidak lupa menggosok gigi, habis mandi ku minum susu, habis itu ku tidur lagi. (ngelawak lho ini ngelawak ketawa dongg yaampun, HAHAHAHAHA ngga lucu ah).

Jam 12 selesai ritual dan gue pun bersiap online. Ayooo kita kerjain om google dan 4shared sama donlotan kita HWHWHWHWHWHWHW. Baru mulai nyalain si kimi, eh kakak gue uda minjem aja mau make :( huuu she bothered me so much ah, belom juga dipake, uda mau gentian aje. Akhirnya ngga jadi online, trus mainan Zuma aja yang uda lumutan ngga pernah dimainin.

i want this! i want this! i want this! now!

So so so, I didn’t have my lunch, instead, I continued reading Pramoedya’s book; Panggil Aku Kartini Saja. It’s about the other side of Kartini’s life and thought, lots about unexposed Java feodals and West imperialism that time. I’m really into the words Pramoedya use to describe every Kartini’s saying and thought and her feeling, however, sometimes I don’t get some words in it because some parts are using old Indonesian idioms.

Hmm... 1 jam.. 2 jam.. 3 jam.. gue ngga sadarkan diri dan tergeletak di sofa; ketiduran. Paling susah deh nahan mata melek kalo kepala nyender di bantal. Dan untungnya gue ngga menambah waktu tidur gue jadi 12 jam penuh cause 10 minutes later my parents came home and I was awaken by their car's alarms. My mom and father seemed exhausted. I boiled a half jar of water and treated them 2 cups of coffee. I'm sure they're tired due to 4-day national work meeting. But they still had a chat with us, talking about those tiring days.

You see? I didn’t get out of my house even to the garage. Betapa cintanya gue sama rumah gue bahkan ngga sanggup ninggalin dia sendirian tanpa kehadiran gue di dalamnya (apa pula ini). Sebenernya bosen juga gitu kenapa ngga pergi aja ke mana kek yaa. Yah, apadaya itu jarang terjadi.

Hmm.. I’m checking online manga, anyway. Persona 4 is no longer updated since the last time I read it on April, approximately. Bah, ngga azek ah. Roi suggested me to play the game to follow the story, but come on, I don’t play games. Nanti gue terlalu jago main games jadi ngalahin gamers lainnya HAHAHAHA lucu sekali.

Mungkin gue harus belajar untuk bermain juga kali ya. Siapa tau gue punya bakat terpendam.
Nah, daripada posting ini berlanjut makin ngga jelas, it’s better to close this meeting tonight. I don’t wanna wake up at noon, again. That’s not good for your health you know, and your own credibility (what is this girl trying to say about?).

Bye.

happy H-3!

happy 14 agustusan!
hahahaha.
ini serius.

today, global held some competitions to celebrate our independence day (on monday). the competitions were running during school hours, yeay. but we must followed a weekly test and firsts 3 hours lesson before having fun with those games. we're not really focus on the 3 hours firsts lesson though.

and the games went on.
i joined 'pass the eel' games with 5 other friends. i'm not disgusted at the eel, but it wasn't easy to pass the eel if your foot's tied up with your partner's -______-
and yah, it was a hot day. i never like being outside with sun's shining on my head. plus, i couldn't see krik krik (sensored) there. hahaha, i'm not so enthusiastic then, you know.

the games were ended by approximately 3.30 but i still stayed in library with Dian (my classmate) to finish our wall magazine. we had been working on this wall magz 3 days before and have just finished this afternoon.
so i got back at 4.30 just like yesterday. i thought this day would be a short and not tiring day. (hmm... i'm not really tired actually, that's just an additional word lah, hahaha)

anyhow, i'm typing this in my room and it's so hot here. i got no fan, no air conditioner, even night breeze. i hate global warming, really. itu bikin udara panas lebai.



*ended by David Archuleta's--To Be With You, whata nice song

yellow and white things

Hwehehehehehehehe.
Manusia ini sedang girang. Manusia ini sedang lebai. Manusia ini sedang dalam keadaan pemulihan kejiwaannya.
Tanya kenapa?
Ini dia… jeng jeng jeng…

gelap, gelap, lampunya uda tewas.

See? Ini yang memancing euphoria ngga normal si manusia penulis blog ini.
Ini nih yang sudah lama dicari dan diburu si manusia ini. Semenjak si manusia ini went overseas to Celebes, sampe sekarang si manusia uda nyebrang lagi dan nyangkut di Bekasi ini, Ini selalu dicari-carinya. Dan sekarang, Ini telah berada dalam genggamannya. Orang tuanya sudah membawa Ini kembali dari rumah singgahnya di Jawa. Ini merupakan kebahagiaan besar buat si manusia ini.

Hahahaha, duh ngga jelas, jadi ribet sendiri.
Iya, jadi garfield ini tuh satu-satunya bantal boneka yang gue punya dan ngga gue takutin. Ngga gue takutin, remember that.
Be honest, I don’t like dolls, especially the big and furry ones. So intinya, boneka berbentuk hewan atau manusia atau tanaman dan yang berbulu banyak dan yang gede. :

Abisnya gara-gara trauma masa kecil. Waktu itu gue masih 6 taun dan sedang dalam rangka berkunjung ke rumah nenek. Ngga disangka-sangka (hahah), di kamar nenek gue terpajang boneka sejenis Susan segede bagong. Jujur, itu ngeri banget, ngeliat boneka yang lebih gede dari badan gue sendiri, dengan senyum yang lebar dan mata yang ngga kedip samasekali.


Dan gue pun keluar kamar dan ngga mau masuk sebelum boneka itu disingkirin, disimpen, atau diapain aja asal gue ngga liat lagi. Selidik punya selidik, boneka itu ternyata warisan kakak gue (mungkin sekitar 12 tahun sebelumnya) yang entah kenapa masih aja disimpen sama nenek. Yaampun bayangin aja gimana ngerinya kalo ditinggal berdua aja sama makhluk gede-tanpa ekspresi begitu, bisa-bisa gue dicaplok hii.
*dih, traumanya aneh banget.

Hmm.. apa lagi ya, lupa.

Ohya, untuk memudahkan ngeblog, laptop Toshiba putih jadul papa gue (yang sudah dianggap seperti milik gue sendiri) sekarang uda punya nama, KIMI, hahaha apadeh aneh banget.
Eh, ini laptop biarpun jadul, tapi nilai sejarahnya tinggi banget. Bayangkan, tanpa si TELA, entah jadi apa gue di SMP dulu. Thankyou so much KIMI, I love you more than my printer.
Zzzz.

That’s enough for today, I’m going to sleep, and it’s almost midnight -_____-
Bye.

endang's story

Halo.
Its 21:50 and I’ve been in front of this laptop for almost 4 hours -___- dan mata gue alhamdulillah belom perih, karna kalo uda mulai perih, tandanya gue bakal belajar Civics cuma setengah jam sebelom weeklynya besok pagi.
Sekarang pun nyambi ngapalin The Importance of Political Socialization in Improving Political Culture (sosialisasi politik, in short, hahaha) plus ngemil Happytos Corn Chip pake tangan kanan, nih, nih gue ngelap tangan pake tisu ko sebelom makan, jadi ngga belepotan (penting ngga sih nih dibahas).

Enough.

Tau ngga, gue sedang dalam krisis suudzan stadium lanjut *wew. Jelek deh, emang nih, parah.
Ada satu temen gue, sebut saja Endang (dikira ini korban hipnotis lampu merah apa?), sedang menempuh pendidikan wajib 9 tahun di salah satu tempat di deket sini. Dulu lumayan deket, ya temenan baik lah ngga nyampe berantem-beranteman. Nah nah nah, semenjak saat itu---disamarkan (cailah) Endang mulai bersikap (dalem pandangan gue) menarik diri dari gue. Susaaaaaahh banget diajak ngobrol (dalem pandangan gue), buat ngejawab pertanyaan gue aja (kaya’) ikan kena umpan (bibirnya nyangkut jadi susah ngomong, buat yg susah ngebayangin gimana kondisi bibir ikan yang kena umpan). Jadi gue ngerasa si Endang bener-bener narik diri dari gue. I’m not there in Endang’s new habitat (iya, Endang juga makhluk hidup yg punya habitat).

diduga sebagai Endang, sang mujair jadi-jadian, berkeliaran di sekitar jabodetabek, harap hubungi rumah pemotongan hewan jika melihat makhluk berciri-ciri seperti di atas.


Hipotesis itu bikin pikiran gue lari ke mana-mana ke yang jelek-jelek deh pokoknya. Apa umpan gue kurang enak? Apa lokasi pemancingan gue ngga strategis? Apa Endang uda kapok kena umpan orang? (JADI ENDANG INI ORANG ATAU MUJAIR???)

Yang jelas, habitat barunya ngga memungkinkan gue terlibat dalam interaksi makhluk hidup di dalemnya. Bahkan gue sering mikir, Endang’s new habitat is much higher beyond mine, and I can’t survive there even it’s only one minute long.

Kadang keasikan sendiri nenggelemin pikiran di pendapat gue itu. Such a fool thought, isn’t it? Gue juga kadang heran kenapa bisa suka ngerendahin diri sendiri by thinking on that way, make out that I have nothing to proud with. Masih plin plan. Skali waktu, bisa nyemangatin orang biar positive thinking. Eh giliran gue sendiri yang lagi down, susaaaaaahh banget think positively -_____-
Jadi sekarang gue mutusin untuk ber-masa-bodoh dengan tetek bengeknya Endang. Kalo lo ngomong ya gue tanggepin, kalo ngga ya gue ngga mau riweuh.

Dan gue slalu nyoba ngebasmi lemak-lemak jahat pikiran gue tentang si Endang and other cases. And so guys, mari kita bersama berpikir positif, supaya otak tetep waras dan Coca-cola makin terkenal (apasih ngga nyambung sumpah).




*nama Endang itu general. Kalo pake ‘e’-nya ‘elang’ itu bisa buat cwo. Nah kalo ‘e’-nya ‘sate’ itu bisa buat cwe. That’s fair, ryt?

ketularan

i've got headache and i've been rather unwell. i think i'm going sick -____-
wish that tomorrow i'll get better. saya hanya mengandalkanmu sebagai obat yang dipercaya mama saya, procold. dan sepertinya kelas saya memang sedang diuji dengan berbagai penyakit, heu.

actually i'm going with my sister to buy a new calculator for my next math lessons. i've lost my old--new one. well it's my old calculator but i hadn't use it many times. i was very dissapointed cause it's like a precious gift from my dad when i was in elementary, that's a big responsibility guys for me in that age.

but my sister said that she'd buy it for me by herself. weew, she's a pretty sister of mine :) not just because she often gives me stuffs from her own pocket, she's so nice when she shows her respect and love to me my mom and my dad and others.

well, i must take a rest and finish my assignments and downloading some songs ;D